Derpy Nights at Freddy's
by AGiantAzz
Summary: A collection of dorky, short one-shots about the characters from the 4 games. Ranging from the bizarre to the funny, I hope you like these! Romance and pairing free for those who don't support ships, as well as OC free unless I say otherwise. Contains AUs and stuff. Rated T just in case things get dark, and my dirt mouth. OC's being accpeted! Go to chapter 3 for details.
1. Jelly Beans

**_Jelly Beans_**

 _A/N: Just a stupid, random story to kick off the series. What is it about? Jelly beans, and everyone's favorite pirate fox. Have fun._

 **12:00 AM** **, 9/15/1995.**

It was just another random night without a guard on duty. Boring. Until a certain fox reactivated before anyone else. Why?

Because there were jelly beans somewhere. That's why.

He had heard of the Jelly Bean before, and according to Bonnie they were worth eating. They came in a wide variety of flavors and you could cram a ton into your mouth at once. Sounded just as good as pizza, he thought. Especially the purple ones. The purple ones were the tastiest, he hoped. Purple jelly beans, mmm.

After thinking about purple jelly beans for about 5 minutes, Foxy emerged from the royal purple curtains and started looking for them sweet, tasty jelly beans.

This stupid search started in the dining room. The tables were somewhat flawless, except the lazy janitor forgot to wipe off a few beverage stains. But other than that, the tables were wiped clean. Getting down as low as his skeleton could go, Foxy looked underneath the tables for any jelly beans. There weren't any. So, getting off the floor, he decided to wander down the west hall and into the janitor's closet, before rummaging through windex, mops and brooms, and various other cleaning materials, there was nothing.

Everything was tossed back in (no, really. As in thrown, underhand.) to the closet, and the search went into the office, where there was no guard. The swivel chair only sat idle, the monitor resting where Mike's booty would be tomorrow night. The fox took a minute to remember Mike's first week. He was a jerk, yeah, but it was fun trying to spook him. Good thing he had the week off, or the door would be hitting him straight in the muzzle.

After poking through some trash, behind the large TV screens, the cupcake, and between shelves, there was a bag of jelly beans lying next to some old photos of previous guards. Screeching, he took the bag by the hole punched in the top with his hook, and ran off to pirate cove at top speed to eat them. Or save them up for later. It was anyone's guess, but no, it wasn't sexual. ROBOTS ARE NOT CAPABLE OF LOVE.

 _A/N: Sorry it was so short. I started typing this up on my phone at 11 last night. But anyway a short and stupid thing to kick off this series. Later this Week: Bonnie takes Freddy's hat. Loses face._


	2. Bonnie vs Freddy

_**Bonnie vs. Freddy**_

 _A/N: Thank you for reading this story! I plan on getting as many chapters out as possible, hopefully 3 or 2 a week, depending on my homework. School is a pain in the ass, so i may slack off a lot. Master Procrastinator is out!_

 **12:15 AM, 9/15/1995**

After the entire jelly bean fiasco, Bonnie had reactivated and decided it was a good idea to go and steal Freddy's hat. Why? We have no idea. But anyway, he was on the bear's left, and had to sneak behind him as to not "wake" him. The bear was shorter than Bonnie by 5 inches, which made it perfect to take the large top hat that resided on his head, as quietly as possible. gently lifting the hat by the brim, he snuck it off the top of his head and put it own his own, making room by lowering his long 5 1/2 inch ears. He then snuck off the deserted ladies' room to see himself in the mirror.

Taking Chica's usual route by slinking into the dining area and then, teleporting to the restrooms, Bonnie slunk into the women's restroom, Standing in front of the sink, he made various poses similar to the ones in selfies, including the duckface and wiggling his non existent eyebrows, among other faces found in memes.

And, then, dramatic pause, Freddy's laughter could be heard in the doorway, making Bonnie freeze and stare. The short yet somehow extremely strong bear looked at him with small, glowing white pupils. The rabbit instantly filled with dread as he took a lurch forward...

and slapped him. Hard.

Hard enough to knock his face clean off his head.

And thankfully they weren't humans. That would be odd. And violent. Among other things.

Freddy took the hat off the taller rabbit's head and put it back on his own. Bon took his face off the floor and dashed for the backstage room to sew it back on. The stitches ehad ripped before. so he was used to sewing his face back on.

The short and quiet bear went and adjusted the hat on his head, before going back to the stage to sleep/deactivate some more.

Elsewhere, Chica and Foxy had heard the whole thing. They were bemused. Extremely bemused. Very odd way to start your evening.

 _A/N: So, how's this looking so far? I'm certain there's some errors in spelling or grammar, so please PM me if you find any! Also, if you have any questions about this series, please let me know. I'll answer as soon as i can. : )_


	3. Chica Learns of the Internet

**_Chica Learns of the Internet_**

 _A/N: Thanks so much to my commenters and followers! it means so much to me!_

 _Also, an OC story, Invasion of the Animatronics, will be written sometime this month! Please go to the bottom Author's Note for details._

 **Fast Forward to September 18, 1998, 10:50 PM. (Freddy's , in this A.U, closes at 9:30 PM)**

Chica sighed and wondered what exactly the "Internet" was. The kids had been talking about it recently, and she wanted to know what exactly what it was. Apparently it was summoned by a "Computer".. a large box with a screen and a keyboard. Didn't Mike have one in the office? A "P.C"? Yeah, a PC.

After hours, Chica went and asked Bonnie just where exactly the PC was located in the office.

"Its on the left, the largest monitor. Its keyboard and mouse are in the drawer built in to the desk. Got that"? He'd said. The chicken nodded and began marching toward the office to access the bulky computer.

Just as expected, the largest monitor on the left side was indeed the PC. Chica hooked the keyboard and mouse up to the computer and booted it up. There wasn't a login, so it immediately opened up to the home page.

Dabbling with the mouse, she clicked "Mozila FireFox", in which the icon had been altered to look like Foxy, cuddling the world and wrapping it in his tail. She wondered who in the world managed to do that, until the home page for FireFox(y) opened up.

The chicken was surprised by how fast the screen popped up, she wasn't sure what to type. Thinking of the band leader's name, she quickly typed in _Freddy Fazbear,_ then pushed _Enter._

The results popped up within seconds. Startled, Chica pushed the images button, and suddenly drawings of Freddy popped up. Some cringy, some wonderful, and some that she couldn't quite process, but made sure to avoid. There wasn't too many nasty ones though, thankfully.

Not quite sure what to do with the search engine yet again, Chica typed in _Bonnie The Bunny_ to the search engine and looked up the image results. The results were nastier. Nasty pairings of Bon with the other robots spammed the screen every few scrolls. She shrugged, but logged off the PC to do something else, like erase that nasty bunch of images from her memory banks. And after that make pizza, perhaps.

 _A/N: So, am I doing better? Logic is screwed in this. Because why series is really fun to write, and I'll start using AU's soon. Such as, say, an anthro AU. Duh._

 _Anyway, if your interested in submitting an OC, please make sure to follow these guidelines.._

 _1- Submit through_ ** _PM'S_** _. It's much easier_ _than doing it through reviews._

 _2- No OC's that are supposedly related to the animatronics. When you submit an OC, I'll be checking the information to make sure its believable. I don't mind multiple entries, however. Just wanna throw that out there. Because reasons._

 _3- No_ _ **Hybrid animatronics**_ _. Seriously. That's stupid. (Ex: a shadow/toy animatronic, a dog/wolf, springlock/nightmare, etc.)_

 _4- Follow these rules, dammit. Violators will be blocked._


	4. Exploring The Fandom

_**Exploring the Fandom**_

 _A/N: Thanks so much for the wait. I've been very busy with school and haven't been able to get out any chapters. I want to burn my schoolwork. This is also the first AU using story. It takes place this year, unlike my other stories, which will take place in the 1970's-1990's. Enjoy! WARNING: Contains not so kid friendly themes, but not in vivid detail. 13+._

 **Unnamed Apartment building, 8:00 PM 9/29/2015. (anthro / modern day AU)**

Bonnie and Foxy had nothing good to do, and it was late at night, so they suddenly got a "great" idea- Check out the fanart in their fanbase. They had already become YouTube sensations, and were internet millionaires. Night as well check out something different than animations and Let's Plays, right?

After booting Bonnie's MacBook Air up, they quickly typed in DeviantART into the search engine, blissfully unaware of the horrors they'd experience soon. It would be something to lock away in the imaginary vault in the back of their minds, never to resurface again. The site popped up in seconds, and the two of them typed "FNAF" into the search engine. Results popped up instantly, much to their surprise.

The results weren't SUPER bad, but it did make the two of them cringe a bit. Some o it looked like it was drawn by 8 year olds. But that was the tip of the iceberg. And it got worse. shipfics and nasty shipping art lurked in the corners of the searched images, and just cringe worthy base abusing was lso in the mix. Neon colored ocs caused eyes to bleed. And with such horrid images being seen, they smashed the computer. After all, they could always buy another one. Right? But before that, the two of them posted a post it on their corkboard: _NEVER GO ON DEVIANTART_ …. this dumb evil saga will not continue...

 _A/N: Look, i know these are short, but their still a pain in the ass to write. My schoolwork and homework are in the way of me writing these up. My phone is also been confiscated, and it's usually where i type these up. so forgive me for having a bitch for a mom and the wait. I'll see you later. : 3_


	5. The AU List

_**The AU list**_

 _A/N: Hey guys. Thought i could share a list of any future AU's that i have in mind. Just to get my creative writing juices flowing. y'know? : D_

List of POSSIBLE AU's:

Anthro AU- every one is an anthropomorphic animal. Some have ties to others. Ex- Freddy + are brothers, and Foxy + Mangle are cousins.

Futurama AU 1- everyone is a robot living in the futurama universe.

Futurama AU 2- everyone is a sewer mutant and just so happen to have animal features.

Gem AU- Everyone is a gem like the kinds in Steven Universe. Freddy is Smoky Quartz, Bonnie is Tanzanite, Chica is Citrine, and Foxy is Spinel, to name a few. Still being developed.

Present Day AU- Everyone from the first game has somehow managed to make it to the year 2015 as a 80/90's nonstalgia thing.

Pirate AU- EVERYONE IS A PIRATE! *meme junk plays in the background*

Bender AU- Everyone can bend a certain element, based on their behavior in their respective games. set in the Legend Of Korra universe.

Steampunk AU- everyone is an anthro living in the fictional Steampunk era.

Genderswap AU- everyone is genderswapped. There are no boobs/dicks, or anything like that. Their just different "genders"

A/N: Sooooo yeah, that a bunch of possible AU's. More stories coming Sunday, I hope.


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